Tuesday, June 23, 2009

RANT: Bad mommy

If there were actually a reality TV show called How NOT to Mommy, I would have been the perfect candidate for the lead role today.
Despite my best efforts to not become crabby with my toddler, I have had moments of extreme crabbiness combined with breathing exercises in attempts to calm myself. I have raised my voice and demanded compliance more than a few times, and I put the toddler in his room once and in time out twice for directly disobeying and being generally defiant.
And mostly my crabbiness and his disobedience is stemming from no nap for either of us.
I'm not sure what happened to break the normal nap-time routine of the day, but it is so broken that there's not going back and bed time may not come soon enough. And this no-nap nonsense comes after he requested to take a nap many times while our friends were still here at noon. And then we spent about three hours trying to take a nap with no success mostly because the toddler felt it appropriate to sing the entire time we were lying down.
So while I have many questions about whywhywhy the toddler felt it necessary to skip nap time on a 92-degree, humid day after a night of not-enough-sleep for the mommy, I'm really only left wondering one thing: am I the only one who has these days where I feel like I could flee to a beach alone and consume overwhelming quantities of pina coladas and mojitos? Of course, in order to do that I would have to be ...
A. Not pregnant
B. Starring on a show called How NOT to Mommy so I could fund it
C. Not utterly opposed to flying on a airplane
and
D. Able to quench any types of guilt and capable of shirking off my responsibility.

So I guess I'll just sit here and try not to think about how it would be really nice to have a mommycation right about now.

Because sometimes, I just cannot be the mommy I really want to be when I'm totally and utterly engrossed in, well, mommying.

5 comments:

  1. I've been on that show too. You are very much not alone in your struggles and I'm sending you warm hugging thoughts. I've had moments I was so upset with B that all I could do was hug her and cry.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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  2. Ohhh, I've had those days. And the peace and quiet on that island are far more important to me than the drinks.

    btw I HAVE put the wee ones down for naps while company was still over and they needed it and continued playing with the friends after that. No nap is baaaad (as we can attest to by Mister WHINY Man at playgroup today. Yep, Daddy put him to bed late last night, so I heard him talking to Little Miss at 6:01am -- who knows what time he actually woke up. Poor bugger is exhausted.

    Here's hoping you got/get lots of sleep tonight -- both of you! And that tomorrow night isn't so beastly hot. I'd like to be able to go outside again.

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  3. Every mom has had one of those days! Most days I wonder why I yelled so much. I swear Jacob cannot hear me, so then I get frustrated, and then I scream. I like your breathing exercises I do them a lot and taught Jacob to take deep breaths when he is agitated as well. Just ... keep breathing.

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  4. There's a good reason my Facebook status today says, "Rachel is grateful each day starts new."

    And as long as we try to be kind parents, I believe this lady's perspective that we are not bad mothers.

    http://raisingmyboychick.blogspot.com/2009/04/we-are-not-bad-moms.html

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  5. I have so many of those days. If I counted all of them over the past 12 years, I would probably get depressed:) Hooray for the next day to start anew. Kids are so resilient. They seem to smile through it all. It's tough on us moms. We try so hard and want everything to go perfectly. It never works quite that way. But our hearts are always in the right place. You're a wonderful mom!

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There's nothing better than good conversation ... but not while talking to myself. Will you play a part in this discussion?

AND will you pretty please have your email linked to your account or leave it for me so I can respond?

Thanks for taking the time to make these thoughts into conversation.

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