Friday, November 6, 2009

Letters of Intent:

Letters of Intent


Dear Toyota Highlander designers,

It's very obvious that when you designed my wonderful SUV, you had me and other mothers in mind. You knew we'd get all geeked about the safety features, the fuel efficiency and the fold-down third row seating; you seemed to know that we mamas need a jillion cup holders because there are many located strategically throughout the car in which to simultaneously store the water bottle, a caffeinated beverage and a few extra necessities like pacifiers, keys, cell phones, kids' socks and chap stick. What really tipped me off and made me realize, though, that you were marketing this car to mostly stay-at home, carpooling moms is the pop-down mirror located directly under the review mirror; I suppose this was meant to be a mom's eyes in the back of her head while driving so she didn't have to go all Linda Blair on her kids while trying to solve who crossed the invisible line with his pinky finger first. I get it; you guys were thinking.
But, that being said, you were all guys, weren't you? And skinny guys, at that. And you all probably have skinny wives, too, because you made accessing the third row seating nearly impossible when two car seats are installed; you seriously either need to be a gymnast with sweet cat-like movements to catapult yourself into that stellar third-row seat or a bean pole to squeeze into the itty bitty space that opens to the back row.
You see, you would have known that easy access to the third row seating while car seats are installed in the middle row is essential because we mamas need to be able to climb back there while the car is packed to the brim and moving to pacify the baby/entertain the toddler/keep the troops calm during a long 11-hour drive when stopping every 20 minutes isn't an option.
Maybe there just wasn't enough space to accomplish this and the fuel efficiency? Well, that's OK. But you forgot an essential part then: the automatic window that shuts off the backseat from the front seat with the touch of a button. If you're gonna make it nearly impossible for a mama to get in the back to stop the squealing without stopping and unpacking half of the car, at least give us the option to push the button and block off the screams. And since we're all brainstorming now, perhaps you could install a foot massaging tool in the passenger seat. Ohh, and an automatic latte machine in the glove box would be handy, too. And maybe a heated, uber padded, massaging seat. Oh, and a relaxing sound buttons. And a chilled eye mask in the cooler that is built into the door and housing several bottles of water would be fab. And how about another automatic window placed conveniently between the driver and passenger seats? Just make sure the majority of the cup holders are on the passenger side, mmk? You could call it the Spalander; and no need to pay me royalties for the name or redesign ideas -- just be sure to send one my way.

Ohh, and don't forget the sound proofing.

XOXO,
Hyacynth

Dear hubby, toddler and baby,

Forget about taking me on any future 11-hour road trips until my new upgraded Spalander arrives. Or I get a separate car in which I can drive alone. In peace. And quiet.

Love,
me

Need to get something off your chest and write your own letter? Link up at FourSons and then read everyone elses' letters.

7 comments:

  1. O, O, O, O...I want a Spalander too! Pretty please with sugar on top?!

    By the way- you're pretty darn skinny, so if you can't get to that 3rd row seat I'm thinking no one can.

    Thanks for linking up- let me know when your new SUV arrives!

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  2. That's awesome! I always send the little kids to the "way back". They are the only ones small enough to climb over all the car seats. Great letter- I want the latte machine too!

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  3. Where do I order my Spalander???

    I agree that the third seat is a joke in many of these vehicles.

    Thanks for writing a letter for all us tired traveling Mamas :)

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  4. I will take you on the Caribbean cruise with my new grandmother (har, har) if you snag me one of those, yeah?

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  5. LOVE it. I have to admit that the Pilot's access to the third row can be a challenge with two carseats installed, too (unless they're middle and side, then it's fine). But the SpaLander? Ahhhhh.

    I'm still stuck on the idea of an 11 hour trip. Yikes!

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  6. i can't wait...can they just install the sound proof passenger compartment with all of the amenities in my car now?

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There's nothing better than good conversation ... but not while talking to myself. Will you play a part in this discussion?

AND will you pretty please have your email linked to your account or leave it for me so I can respond?

Thanks for taking the time to make these thoughts into conversation.

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