Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Thinking, that's All: If it Works

Against warnings from so many, all exlaining that our children would never sleep alone, would never sleep through the night without us, we decided to share sleep with our kids.

A new mother, barely getting any sleep with her high-needs baby clinging to her arms for dear life, I did the only logical thing I could think to do in the face of desperation and exhaustion:

I took my baby to bed with me.

And we slept.

We slept without many pillows, without cushy blankets, without foam mattress pads and anything else that could be hazardous to baby's well being.

But we slept.

So when number two came along, we did it all over again.

day 218

Even though we've continuously been advised against co-sleeping, others citing all of the nevers and won'ts and can'ts and shouldn'ts, we prayefully pressed on.

Because it worked for our family -- we were sleeping pretty well, we were interacting lovingly and we were finding peace in it.

And the few times we'd tried something different, questioning ourselves and our choices, those ventures ended in disaster, culminating in frustration and tears and unrest.

We had to learn that our family was just that -- ours.

And we needed to make decisions based on what worked well for us.

So we slept.


When each boy turned about 13 months old or so, we began transitioning them to our old queen-sized bed on the floor in their room -- a place either John or I could easily find rest should a child need one of us to climb in and snuggle.

G has been been sleeping through the night pretty regularly in his bed for about a year.

And last night, for the first time ever, E joined him all.night.long.

Few tears. Few frustrations. Few nights of unrest. {Nothing perfect at all, but much more manageable than trying to force arrangements that left everyone cranky and tired and upset.}

All solidifing in my mind, that if it works for OUR family, if it works for YOUR family, don't try to fix it.

Because it was never broken in the first place.