Monday, January 9, 2017

On Not Buying the Biggest Lie

Early last month, we shared the news that our family is #nowpendingseven, as we are pursing the international adoption of our girls' older sister.

Shortly thereafter we began the arduous process of compiling all of our paperwork and getting all of our clearances ... again. 

Starting the process all over again after just having finished our first adoption last year at this time, feels overwhelming in so many ways; the process is long and complex and heart-wrenching because 

the waiting. 

the uncertainty.

the emotions. 

It's just a lot. A lot that is all worthwhile, don't get me wrong, but a lot, nonetheless.

A few afternoons ago, as I was pondering in particular finances, I was feeling like 😳 and {crying face} and {freaking out face}.

But I knew I was needing to stop thinking like that and embrace 😇 and 😎 and 😊.

So I began having an honest conversation with God about how that feels more than a little challenging because lots of lies have started popping up ... like, specifically in that area of finances,

how could we really ask for help again?

And where’s this all going to come from?

And we are so unprepared.

Lies, God said.

But lies I was being tempted to linger in, believe and allow to dictate my actions and thoughts and behaviors.

Lies ...

Because we can always ask for help.

Because can always humble our hearts and admit when we need the body to be the body and come together to make something happen.

Because God designed us to do life together.

Because God could drop a million dollars in our laps however he wanted but He invites us in to be part of the beautiful things He's doing.

And then a message from a friend popped up as I pondered buying the lies or digging my heels into the truth:

“I have something I want to talk to you about. Can you call me?”

I called my friend quickly, and she proposed a fundraiser where she could offer a class because God has been bringing this back to her heart repeatedly.

And that’s when tears sprang to my eyes.

But it wasn’t about the class. Or even the funds. Or even just her genuine and sweet offer.

It was about this:

"Worry is belief gone wrong." {Ann Voskamp}

Worry was washing over me because I felt alone, like I had to do this all by myself. 

But God. God always, always, always sees us, and He is always, always, always with us.

Do we see Him?

When I take a step back from my worry, He so often finds a way to show me that He's there. Many times it’s through His word or a song or other people saying “God laid it on my heart to …" reach out/call/come over/pray/give/help.

And so the biggest lie I was buying wasn’t that people are sick of helping or that we couldn’t ask for help or that we are so annoying or that we weren’t going to have the funds …

the biggest lie I was buying was that God didn’t see me, that He wasn’t and isn’t near, that He won’t or can’t be or isn't in the midst of this part of challenges that come along with all the different parts of our lives.

We don't have to see over the mountain we're still climbing or around the curve in the bend on the road we're heading  because we have a very good Guide by our side. 

"I will never fail you; I will never abandon you." {God, Hebrews 13:5}

Yes, the mountains are steep. And the curves are dark and deep, but we don't walk them alone.

And that's what makes the difference: when we know God, who is good, is with us no matter the steepness of the mountain or the curves of the road ahead, we can replace worry with worship and we can face the journey ahead with hope and with joy and with courage instead of despair, fear and anxiety.

And, more than the height of the mountain or the starkness of the curves in the road, that's really what makes all the difference in the journey. 

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